I believe that the ladies taking the time to read this blog probably desire to be a “Proverbs 31 woman.”
“Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies.” Proverbs 31:10
I’m sure that the ladies reading this blog would love for Proverbs 31:28 to be descriptive of herself, her children, and her husband…
“Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.”
However, ladies, are you willing to do what is necessary to become a Proverbs 31 woman?
I was recently reminded of George Washington’s Rules of Civility & Decent Behavior In Company and Conversation. By the time George Washington was 16 years old, he had copied out, by hand, 110 rules of proper behavior and etiquette. Although it was used as an exercise in penmanship, George Washington took these rules to heart.
- Put not off your clothes in the presence of others, nor go out your chamber half dress’d.
- Do not laugh too loud or too much at any publick spectacle.
- Use no reproachfull language against any one; neither curse nor revile.
- Play not the peacock, looking every where about you, to see if you be well deck’t, if your shoes fit well, if your stockings sit neatly, and clothes handsomely.
- Associate yourself with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation; for ‘tis better to be alone than in bad company.
- Speak not injurious words neither in jest nor earnest scoff at none although they give occasion.
- Be not curious to know the affairs of others neither approach those that speak in private.
We could say that most of these rules of proper behavior and etiquette are no longer “en vogue.” In other words, they are no longer popular and therefore you don’t find this type of behavior modeled too often or being actively taught. Unfortunately, that which the Bible speaks of regarding what makes a Proverbs 31 woman is also no longer “en vogue” – it is no longer popular; not even, at times, amongst Christian women!
“(vs. 3) The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; (vs. 4) That they may teach the young women to be lsober, to love their husbands, to love their children, (vs. 5) To be ediscreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.” Titus 2:3-5
This passage is directed to the aged women and to the young women. Lest I offend anyone, allow me to simply say – All aged women were once young women and all young women will one day become aged women. Therefore, this passage of Scripture is applicable to every lady in this auditorium – both aged and young!
The Behavior of Ladies.
Behavior – the way one lives!
Quote: “The way a woman moves, the look on her face, what she says or leaves unsaid, and her habitual attitude of mind and body are all included in ‘behavior.’”
How should a Godly woman’s conduct be characterized?
- Holiness – Ladies, your behavior should project the character trait of holiness.
“Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
“While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.
“Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel;
“But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.” 1 Peter 3:1-4
- Not false accusers – The Greek word that is used here is “diabolos.” It occurs 38 times in the New Testament and 34 of those times it refers to Satan. Satan is a slanderer. He is the “accuser of the brethren.” Ladies, nothing can be more destructive to the harmony of a home or the local church than the gossip and slanderous remarks that can come out of your mouth!
“Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good fto the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.
“And grieve not the holy Spirit of God, whereby ye are sealed unto the day of redemption.
“Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:
“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” Ephesians 4:29-32
- Not given to much wine – Given then number of times that Paul refers to the sin of intoxication, it was evidently all too common of a sin in the early church. Ladies, don’t allow anything to control you other than the Holy Spirit. Be a Spirit-filled, godly woman!
“And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit;” Ephesians 5:18
Ladies, you should give more attention to your inward character than you do your outward appearance and dress.
- Teachers of good things – The Greek word that is used here for teacher refers to an instructor who is acknowledged for their mastery in their field of learning. Another way that this could be said is “teaching what is good.” Ladies, there is a right way and a wrong way to behave, to live, to dress, to speak, to conduct your life. We live in a society where anything goes and some – even Christian ladies – have taken that literally! Unfortunately, the feminist movement has only reinforced the idea that anything goes!
The Responsibilities of Ladies.
The responsibility of ladies is to teach. Ladies, you teach by example and you also teach by exhortation. What should you teach?
- To be sober – To be sensible. To think right. To make good decisions. Making good decisions begins with thinking properly. Thinking properly begins with God’s Word. Teach the young ladies, by example and exhortation, to make much of God’s Word!
- To love their husbands and to love their children – This does not come naturally. Why? Because we are sinners and naturally are lovers of self! The young ladies need to be taught how to take their eyes off themselves and place them onto others.
- To be discreet – To be prudent which, while it carries the thought of being wise, also carries with it the matter of being appropriate. Young ladies need to be taught how to act appropriately; how to dress appropriately; how to speak appropriately; how to behave appropriately around others. Much of what the world would say is appropriate should be, to a Christian, unacceptable!
- To be chaste – Purity; Innocence. Those are two words which have been thrown out the window! At the root of this word, chaste, is the word, holy! We live in a world where our young ladies are losing their purity; losing their innocence at an ever-younger age – much of it in the name of “Education!” There are those who advocate starting sex education in Kindergarten in the public schools.
- To be keepers at home – This is probably the least popular item on this list. Many women have sacrificed their home, their marriage, their children on the altar of having a career. Our young ladies need to be taught that being a mother; being a home-maker does not make them a second-class individual. On the contrary, to be “keepers at home” is one of the most rewarding and fulfilling roles that a woman can fill!
- To be good – This carries with it the idea of being kind and generous. I’m sure that there are those I this congregation who would give the testimony that their mothers sacrificed so that they could have. Why? Because their mother was good. This kind of goodness only comes about as an individual is humble and un-selfish two traits which are not well-known these days.
- To be obedient to their own husbands
“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
“For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
“Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.” Ephesians 5:22-24
This also, is not a very popular idea today.
Maybe this will make it a little easier to accept: Wives should be guided by their husbands. Understand, God is a God of order. The lines of authority within the home have been clearly drawn in the New Testament. For our sake, and the sake of our homes, we must not seek to rearrange the order which God has instituted.
We need ladies to behave like Godly ladies. We need ladies to teach other ladies how to behave like Godly ladies! But why? Notice the end of Titus 3:5…
“That the Word of God be not blasphemed!”
Your behavior as a child of God will go a long way to either uphold the testimony of God’s Word or to cause it to be spoken of in an evil way. Your desire should be…
“Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.” Matthew 5:16
Ladies, I pray that your desire is to point others to Jesus Christ. Your behavior; your response to God’s Word; can be used by God to bring others to him! Ladies, you can be sure that, if you honor God’s Word, He will honor you!